LADIES AND GENTLEMAN I HAVE AN ANNOUNCEMENT, I’M OFFICIALLY OFF THE MARKET, MY DAVID HAS PROPOSED AND I SAID “YES”, I AM THE HAPPIEST AND THE MOST BLESSED WOMAN IN THE WORLD AND IT’S ALL BECAUSE OF JESUS CHRIST!!!
My David surprised me yesterday when he popped the question, I wasn’t expecting it this soon but I’m glad he did, some may think we’re moving extremely fast considering we’ve only dated a month, that’s true but WE’RE NOT STRANGERS TO EACH OTHER, we’ve known each other for a year, we’ve interacted many times so we’re not strangers, we’re talking and being transparent with all our flaws, issues, past hurts, and regrets, our relationship is rooted and grounded in the word of God, WE’RE SAVING OURSELVES FOR OUR WEDDING NIGHT no sexual contact outside of kissing, no touching, feeling, or rubbing of any areas that will arouse either of us. We are determined not to disappoint the Lord in our flesh, it’s been EXTREMELY DIFFICULT being around him and not have sex with him, all my adult life I’ve used sex as a way to get a man BUT I ALWAYS GOT THE SHORT END OF THE STICK (NO PUN INTENDED) my identity WAS in sex (notice the emphasis on WAS) I based all my numbville feelings and emotions on sex but it left me hurt and jaded until I decided to change my way of thinking.
I had to learn through the word of God and prayer my worth in this world, I am fearfully and wonderfully made says King David in Psalms 139. My self esteem took years of abuse from men whom I allowed to use me simply because I was scared to be alone, my thinking at that time was so warped, I thank God I’m not warped anymore, I know my worth, MY DAVID KNOWS MY WORTH, he’s told me what attracted him to me from the beginning, he loved my spirit and the way my neighbors who are single mothers like me respected my authority and life experiences plus the kids loved me too. No man has ever been affected by my spirit, it’s always been about my body, DAVID IS WILLING TO WAIT FOR ME AND I LOVE HIM DEARLY FOR IT. We have a spiritual connection from the heavens, it’s hard to explain and most wouldn’t understand if they’ve never experienced Jesus’ power in their lives like David and I have, we know where our power source lies, it lies within the bosom of the Lord, we want to have a successful marriage and this is the only way to make that happen.
We have bible studies and prayer daily and each night before we hang up for the night, and since we’re an interracial couple we’ve discussed our cultural differences, it was interesting to learn of different cultures it’s exciting and I’m looking forward to learning more about his family history and him in general, with God’s help we know we will be together forever. I’m having my first appointment with my counselor for PTSD I’m looking forward to meeting with them because in spite of all the happiness I’m experiencing as of late, I still struggle with anger and the other issues that goes with PTSD the sooner I address these problems the sooner I can heal I’m not carrying baggage into my marriage by taking it out on him, it’s not his fault so why should he have to pay the price? I love the Lord, I love my David, I’m loving life, and I’M LOVING LOVE, THANK YOU JESUS FOR NOT ONLY GIVING US LOVE BUT SHOWING US HOW TO LOVE THROUGH COMPROMISE AND SACRIFICE. BE BLESSED MY PEEPS, I’ll keep you posted