Preacher Kid Confessions

The true story of one woman's journey in faith

photo of woman wearing white dress near flower arbor

Photo by Quang Nguyen Vinh on


Hey my peeps I pray all is well with ya’ll, I’m doing as good as I can be considering the emotional and spiritual turmoil I’ve been in since my wedding day. I notified family and friends of my engagement and eventual marriage in February of this year, I sent 60 invitations out to friends inviting them to our celebration, they all RSVP’D and said they would come. I ordered and cooked enough food to feed 60 people, I cooked the sides, and had the meat catered spending almost $500 on food alone, I also ordered a bounce house for the kids, trying to make my guests as comfortable as possible including dress code etc… I tried to cover all my bases before the big day so everything can go off without a hitch, HOW NAIVE WAS I? The ceremony came and went, it’s was humid outside I was burning up in my wedding gown but it was worth it seeing MY DAVID in all white, he looked SOOOOO FINE! My mom was here to help me get dressed, my daughter was my maid of honor, my flower girl looked beautiful, the best man, papa, and my 3 brother/uncles were there to celebrate my big day, it was a special moment I will remember for the rest of my life.

The ceremony was beautiful, standing there next to David was as we looked into each other’s eyes was like nothing I’ve ever experienced before it was TRULY AWESOME, we said our vows, exchanged rings, and was pronounced MAN AND WIFE before God, family, and friends. We went to take photos as our guests began eating, within 15 minutes people started coming to us saying they’re goodbyes as they begin to leave, we hadn’t had our first dance yet nor did we have our daddy/daughter dance before people started leaving. At some point as I tried to make the best of the situation by dancing with my husband and papa but hardly NO ONE WAS THERE TO SEE IT and those who did stay weren’t paying attention, they were on their phones or talking in groups. The only people I saw watching us was my HOST FAMILY INCLUDING PAPA, they’re my family although I work for them. they’ve treated me like family and sacrificed a lot to help make my wedding day the best it could be and I will forever be grateful to them.

They had the house painted, trees trimmed, gutters changed, grass cut, and house professionally cleaned in order to make sure my guests are as comfortable as possible, my wedding planner was AWESOME, the girl got SKILZ she’s so creative and thought of everything including things I didn’t she made my life a lot easier knowing she had my best interest at heart we were in sync the entire time ABSOLUTELY NO BRIDEZILLA moments between us EVER! Everything was just soooo beautiful, it was great seeing all my guests, don’t get me wrong and yes I appreciate that they came and left words of encouragement and gifts but it still hurt when I looked around and saw the majority my guests leaving or had left, a couple people came long enough to say hello, give me a hug, one left money, the other noting at all, IT WAS DEFLATING AND EMBARRASSING at the same time and as I operated on adrenaline from sun up it didn’t really hit me until the next day when I went to help clean up and saw all the food left over, once that happened all the emotions just came out of me and I cried for about 10 minutes.

I’m aware some of my guests had personal issues they’re dealing with, I get that, I just thought maybe coming to our celebration might give them a reprieve from their situations even if it was for 2 to 3 hours. Also, 20 PLUS guests never showed up with NO NOTIFICATION to this day that’s why there was so much food left over so after getting over my anger and disappointment I called the BATTERED WOMEN’S SHELTER and donated the rest of the food and cupcakes that were left. There was less than 10 people who witnessed our cake cutting, no one took pictures, everyone was texting or scrolling on their phones, the music had issues because of poor wifi connection at the house so there were silent pockets in between due to no fault of the DJ’s own, he did the best he could with what he had, one guests son broke MY BRIDE GLASS so I have to replace it, no one hardly played on the bounce house it just sat there most of the night EMPTY!

I never would’ve thought MY WEDDING DAY would end in such a DUD!!! No one stayed to throw rice at us as we rode off into the sunset we left following each other because he rode the motorcycle so we can ride off on it afterwards BUT IT NEVER HAPPENED, we left together and went home to begin our honeymoon. I was so disappointed I couldn’t even focus on my husband, my feelings are hurt even as I write this to ya’ll I wouldn’t wish this hurt on my enemy let alone a friend. I just buried my FIRST COUSIN WHO WAS MURDERED the week before my wedding, my matron of honor had to cancel the morning of the wedding, my makeup person cancelled 2 hours before thank God we had a backup plan so it worked out in the long run, my mom brought the man she’s seeing whom I don’t like with her but thankfully he didn’t come to the wedding, (THANK GOD, IT WAS ONE OF THE FEW GOOD MEMORIES I HAD THAT DAY). No one in my huge 200 plus family attended my wedding but my mom and daughter, THEY DON’T TRAVEL, (UNLESS IT’S TO THE BAHAMAS, FLORIDA, ATLANTA, you know places like that, BUT NOT THEIR NEICE’S/COUSIN’S WEDDING, OH NO WE DON’T TRAVEL. That’s the excuse they gave me at the funeral and prior to that and I’M EXPECTED TO APPRECIATE WHAT I GOT INSTEAD OF WHAT I DIDN’T GET.

I’m quite sure if another bride had the same things happening to them that happened to me and my husband this past weekend they’d be just as hurt as I am. My husband has no idea I feel this way I’ve tried to hide my disappointment from him, I’ve been praying and reading my bible the last couple days asking the Lord to help me deal with my anger and hurt. I’m not holding any grudges against anyone who left because it’s not of God for me to do so I will just try to remember the way my husband looked at me expressing his eternal love and devotion to me for the rest of our lives, and how good he looked in his  wedding attire, we’re looking forward to a lifetime of love and we’re ready for anything that will try to divide us and break our covenant we made before God, we will have another wedding at our church in about a month, it will be a do-over for the previous ceremony, I can’t wait to see how it will be, my church is huge and beautifully decorated so I’m sure this one will be just as beautiful as the first in spite of the difficulties we faced.

My husband and I are thankful for those who took the time to attend and are grateful for the words of encouragement and gifts that were left behind we will read them together and try to implement them into our marriage in order for it to be successful as theirs. I’m going to need them to pray and teach me how to be a good wife to my husband whether they’re male or female, I will value both perspectives because my brother/uncles can give me advice on how to make my husband happy from a man’s point of view and the women from a woman’s point of view, either way WE ARE SET, OUR FRIENDS ARE PRAYING AS WE ARE THEM. I pray all is well with them since I saw them last and I look forward to seeing and or hearing from them soon. I AM MRS. MY DAVID HEYYYYYY. Lord Jesus thank you for forgiving me of my shortcomings and anger please help me to speak better no matter what the circumstance my dictate, take away my hurt and disappointment and help me replace the bad memories with good ones during our church wedding. Let the words I say be seasoned with salt in order for man to receive them and forgive me of my sins of omision and commission, in Jesus’ name we pray Amen. Be blessed my peeps we’ll talk soon


man hugging woman near seashore

Photo by on


I remember when I was a teenager, I saw my aunts and uncles going through divorce left and right eventually it reached my home when my parents divorced but before that happened I was babysitting one of my little cousins, I was 16 or 17 years old I was looking at my cousins who’re being raised by my single mother aunt having to live without their father in the home it bothered me so I began praying to God telling Him “I’M NOT DIVORCING SO whomever it is He has for me please clean us both up before bringing us together cuz I’M NOT DIVORCING!!!! I remember it like it was yesterday, divorce was normal in my family but I was determined to break that curse before I was married so I lived my life becoming engaged 3 separate times over the last 30 years choosing or attracting men who weren’t COMMITTMENT MINDED, they only wanted to PLAY HOUSE day after day, year after year as I fell into their trap of lies and deceit making promises they knew they wouldn’t keep.

My child’s father is the worst of them all, I believed EVERYTHING HE TOLD ME he is a good manipulator and con artist who totally had me fooled as to who he really was and it’s obvious I had NO IDEA WHO I WAS OR WHAT I WANTED FOR MY LIFETIME MATE I have the shattered pieces of my heart in a ZIPLOC BAG to prove it, my heart needed a second chance and the only way to do that was to give my life to Jesus in a more meaningful way, working on my issues from the past and praying for healing from old wounds self-inflicted or otherwise, I decided to humble myself by allowing the Lord to navigate my life preparing me for the husband He has for me, I didn’t know as much as I thought I did no wonder my life was such a mess. I made it up in my mind over 3 years ago to serve the Lord by serving others, I was ministering to people who’s hurting, sharing my story with others, praying for those who ask for it and those who didn’t.

I decided that I needed to SIT DOWN IN ORDER TO BE FOUND, the bible says “He who finds a wife, finds a good thing and obtain favor from the Lord. Proverbs 18:22, I had to stay out of the nightclubs, bars, social clubs, ballgames, hook a sista up circles, etc.. before God would send me my mate, I didn’t realize I was blocking my own blessing being out of place in Jesus so once I decided to live for Him, He decided to open up the window of blessings I had no room enough to receive when He sent MY DAVID TO MY DOOR. David has spoken to my heart from DAY ONE, he goes out of his way to make me happy and to take care of me and my daughter, she loves David, he treat her better than her dad does when we went on our road trip home to mama, she sat in the front seat with David while he drove there and back I’m so happy they get along.

My child’s father married a woman who hates my child’s GUTS and always have, he allows her to mistreat my child daily, she’s mean, evil, insecure, and ugly, VERY UGLY, she looks like a DEMON, she’s the female version of Dr. Conrad Murray Michael Jackson’s murderous doctor. She would make a persons skin crawl when they see her that’s how EVIL SHE IS.  She calls my child DUMB, NASTY, STUPID, AND A B***H throughout her whole life and continues to this day. I can’t do anything outside of HURTING HER BADLY my hands are tied PLUS as a Christian I must allow the Lord to avenge me and my daughter, His word says “Vengeance is mine saith the Lord and I will repay. It’s not easy waiting for people like her to get their COMEUPANCE I’ll just pray the Lord will have mercy on both she and my child’s father when He does.

My David is such a blessing to me, he’s a hard working, loyal, gentle, caring, loving, selfish at times, funny, silly, and kind man, he does love me I feel it deep in my heart, I’m looking forward to becoming MRS MY DAVID in the next few days, everything is coming into focus, my wedding planner is the most talented, creative, and caring person we’ve gotten along from the beginning, NO BRIDEZILLA MOMENTS EVER!!! It’s been EASY BREEZY BEAUTIFUL and I recommend her to everyone. It will be a beautiful ceremony, we’re ready, willing, and able to do this, to hang in there for better and for worse, he’s proven to be really supportive to me during my cousin’s death and funeral, he’s a good provider, and he’s willing to live his life according to God’s word realizing that He is the reason we’re together, we MUST KEEP HIM NUMBER ONE IN OUR MARRIAGE He’s OUR foundation and backbone, we can’t make it without God in our lives and as long as He’s there, WE’LL BE THERE.

Thank you Lord for sending me My David, thank you for my trials and tribulations leading up to My David finding me, thank you for loving me when I wasn’t acting very lovable, thank you for teaching me my worth in you so I can be of some worth to my child and my husband to be, please teach me your ways so that I may learn how to be a Kingdom Wife and mother to my Kingdom Husband and daughter, show me how to love them unconditionally as you have with me all my life, teach me patience, understanding when it’s needed and LOVE when it’s desired. Thank you for knowing me better than I know myself, thank you for your grace and mercy when I fall short, thank you for my child, friends, and family, most of all, thank you for Jesus who gave His life that I might have life WITH MY DAVID!!

Ladies, stay faithful in the Lord if you’re looking for a husband, I did by wearing a ring I purchased for myself on my left hand calling Jesus my husband until He sent my real husband to me. I lived as though I was already married although I had no prospects at the time. It took years but it was worth the wait, I’M AN EXTREMELY BLESSED WOMAN OF GOD. Thank you Jesus we love you and welcome you into our hearts, lives, and marriage. Pray for us my peeps and we will you as long as we have breathe to do it.

Let the words of my mouth and meditation of my heart be acceptable in thy sight oh Lord my strength and my redeemer. BE BLESSED ALL DAY EVERYDAY MY PEEPS

american back view burial cemetery

Photo by Pixabay on


Hey ya’ll I hope ya’ll are well, this day is a bad day for me, I was awaken at 530am by a call from mama informing me one of my cousins who was raised with me like a sister when we were kids was MURDERED last night by a man who’d been stalking her. I’M NUMB AND IN SHOCK, she was only 40 years old with 2 kids and 1 grandchild and now she’s gone, FOREVER!! She’s my second cousin to have been murdered in the last 20 years, my other male cousin was shot to death in his home while defending his sister from her abusive baby daddy once she left him and moved in with her brother tired of being beat up on a daily basis, he walked to the door of my cousin’s house yelling through the door as my cousin attempted to diffuse the situation, the guy shot 6 times through the door striking my cousin in the chest killing him in front of his wife, kids, mother (my aunt), and sister and now here we are ONCE AGAIN BURYING A COUSIN FROM A VIOLENT ACT!!! WOW I’M JUST NUMB!!!

My cousin did the right thing LEGALLY by filing restraining orders and notifying others of her stalking but nothing stopped him from breaking into her house and strangling her to death, he then drove her to the hospital leaving her there for people to walk by staring at her as she lay there DEAD. He then drove her car to my aunt’s home left it there with no explanation and fled the scene. He turned himself into the police later I’m sure we’ll find out what happens next in the near future, in the meantime I must begin my mourning process for my cousin who grew up with me more as a sister than cousin, my cousins and I spent every weekend with each other throughout our childhood, our grandmother was our parent’s free babysitter so we all meet at grandma’s each day to play, fight, and eat.

The timing of this couldn’t be more strange, I just finished early voting, this go around the voters were more prepared to vote so I spent most of my time joking around, giving men and women compliments on their outfits (some of them were SHARP AS A TACK), MOST IMPORTANTLY, I spent my time witnessing and praying for people who were hurting. One girl just lost her best friend so I asked if I could pray for her, she consented and I prayed for her on the spot for healing and comfort during her bereavement time, shortly thereafter a regular voter came in this time without her husband, she was crying as she stood in line to get her application to vote, she began talking to my boss who she’s known for years continuing to cry between sentences. Once she finished her conversation she came to me as I put my arm around her leading her to the voting machine to vote not knowing why she was so upset and not caring the reason just sensing in my spirit that I needed to pray for her AND SO I DID, I put both arms around her, holding her as she cries and I began praying for her. I felt so sorry for her I wished I could do more but at that time prayer to me seemed to be the safest bet.

Once we finished praying together, she thanked me, and hugged me again before starting her voting process so I walked away to get my next customer. Lastly, a single woman who’s been searching for a husband has become discouraged because of time passing and no opportunities on the horizon. As she told me her story I remembered being in her same position 7 months ago before MY DAVID came knocking on my door, so once she finished venting, I told her MY STORY and how I had to SIT DOWN IN ORDER TO BE FOUND, it motivated her to KEEP ON KEEPIN ON and she left feeling more bubbly than she did when she arrived because without faith it’s impossible to please God and I’ve always had faith the Lord would send me my husband WHEN HE FELT I WAS READY FOR HIM!

WE JUST GOT THE AUTOPSY REPORT ON MY COUSIN, she died from a heart attack while being assaulted and choked to death, there are marks on her neck and big patches of hair missing from her head  down to the roots, the detectives have vowed to get some answers and solve this case giving me and my family the closure we need to move forward. I’ve prayed for my family in between mourning my cousin, my heart is broken for her and her kids, I can only hope this tragedy can bring our broken family back together, we’ve been estranged for quite some time, my mom and I’ve been praying we get it together before it’s too late NOW IT’S TOO LATE WE MUST STOP THE DIVISION AND COME TOGETHER IN THE NAME OF JESUS.

I will continue to lean on the Lord during this time, David has been super supportive of me since this morning waiting on me hand and foot trying his best to make me feel better in any way he can, I love him so much for being there for me and mama, the Lord knew what I needed and when and I will keep trusting His judgement concerning my life after all He created me in His image and knows me better than I know myself. The bible says, “Weeping endures for a night BUT JOY comes in the morning”. I will mourn my little cousin for a MINUTE, then I’ll JOY FROM THIS DAY FORWARD. Please don’t hesitate to repair damaged relationships, tomorrow is not promised to NO ONE. Please keep us in prayer, will talk to you soon my peeps.  BE BLESSED


clouds girl mountain dog

Photo by Vladimir Kudinov on


I’m sitting at work this holiday day with my papa whose going to be giving me away in 3 weeks at my wedding. I’m getting more and more excited about becoming “MRS. MY DAVID” I can hardly contain myself, we’re BOTH excited because we won’t have to worry about disappointing God by fornicating before marriage, we’ll finally be HUSBAND & WIFE and legal to be together sexually. I’d be lying if I said it was easy not being intimate with David, he’s an extremely handsome and sexy man and with my sexual addiction it makes it twice as hard to sustain from sex BUT OUR MINDS AND HEARTS WERE SET ON STAYIN’ CELIBATE UNTIL OUR WEDDING NIGHT NOT DISAPPOINTING AND DISRESPECTING GOD He means more to us individually and as a couple to risk shaming Him even if it’s in the privacy of our own home.

We’re also excited because we’re in love and want to live our lives together for as long as the Lord allows we’ve been working hard on our issues, we’re both strong willed people who’s been single and taking care of ourselves for a long time learning how to compromise and co-exist under one roof, adding the death of his long time pet Butcher, it’s been quite a struggle but it has bought us closer together and made it worth while. Wesson has definitely made a huge difference with David, he was standoffish with him at first, I understood that it would be but I wasn’t gonna let him treat Wesson different because he wasn’t Butcher.

It took a couple days but Wesson has won his heart and won him over, he’s making up silly little songs about Wesson, he tells him he loves him and he takes him for walks in the morning. He’s attempting to train him to be more obedient just like he did with Butcher and Mamas, I’m leaving it up to him because he knows what to do, I DON’T HAVE A CLUE, NOR DO I WANT A CLUE on how to train dogs. They’re playing fetch, and wrestling on the floor like two big kids until Wesson get too excited and begins to bite.

We rode the bike to get Butcher’s ashes from the clinic, it was rough for me at first, my concern was how David would react, he misses Butchie, we both do but he was closer to him than I was. Wesson is only 1 yrs old and very energetic, he does the funniest things while playing he’s been a joy and frustration at the same time but he’s also been the perfect healing for MY DAVID’S HEART ACHE, his heart was shattered into a million pieces when Butcher died I thank God for creating dogs to piece back together the hearts of those who have lost their FURRY FAMILY ON FOUR LEGS AND I’M GLAD TO ADD DAVID TO THE LIST.

He’s my hero and the love of my life, thank you Lord for knowing ME better than ME, I couldn’t have prayed for a better man to be my helpmeet and friend as you My God intended us to be, may we continue to grow in you, your word and in each other TIL DEATH DO US PART!! Thank you for our extended families and the fact that we GET ALONG although we’ve never met give, me the wisdom to know when and how to be a responsible, loving, and supportive mother/grandmother figure to our children/grandchildren AS WELL AS TO MY HUSBAND AND SUPPORTER who you sent knocking on my door to change my life for the better (although my life was great before).

Welcome to our family my perfect WessonAlity, you are a blessing and quite the addition to our home, thank you Lord for being our Jehovah Jireh our provider by supplying all our needs according to YOUR riches and glory through Christ Jesus our Lord. Phillipians 4 Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in THY SIGHT, oh Lord my strength and my redeemer. BE BLESSED ALL DAY EVERYDAY LIKE ME

photo of short coat tan and white dog

 Photo by Viktoria B. on


There’s a saying I heard on a song, it’s the theme for the sitcom Empty Nest from the 80’s, in the song, the beginning verse says “Life goes on and so do we” and I’ve tried to live by that statement over the years, it’s not always easy but it’s plausible. We lost our Butcher 2 days ago, My David’s having a hard time right now and I completely understand, he’s been with Butcher since he was a puppy and now he’s gone after 12 years, if I was in his position I’d be reacting this way too but WE MUST MOVE ON, Butcher is gone and we must keep living our lives no matter how much we miss him.

We knew we would get another dog, it was just a matter of when it would happen, we were looking on the adopt a pet website and saw the most beautiful brown pit bull named WESSON. He looks like Butcher and his brother JoJo, he’s 1 1/2 years old, he’s a stray who was left alone in the elements for weeks before he was rescued by animal control. He has beautiful brown eyes to match his beautiful brown coat, there’s a patch of white on his nose and he’s HYPERRRRRRRR!!!! This weekend is adopt a pet weekend, the adoption fee is waived and they’re giving animals away for FREE so we rushed to animal control to get WESSON MY NEW PUPPY!

He took to us immediately, jumping and licking us any and everywhere while we wait for his paperwork to adopt to be finalized. We got OUR WESSON, I call him MY PERFECT WESSONALITY, it was a chore getting him into the car, he kept running away until finally we were able to coral and place him into the hatchback where he stayed a whole minute before jumping into front seat while I’m driving on the freeway, David is working MY RESERVE NERVE, he’s showing favoritism  between the dogs, he’s standoffish with Wesson simply because he’s not Butcher, he’s making comments like “he’s not my dog”, he’s not eating out of Butcher’s bowl, he’s not gonna chew on Butcher’s bed, he’s not gonna play with Butcher’s toys, YADA, YADA, YADA, BLAH, BLAH, BLAH, and he’s angering me to no avail.

I don’t like him mistreating WESSON because he’s mourning Butcher, I understand he’s hurting but Butcher is gone and we must move on, I’m not trying to replace Butcher in the house or in his heart, he must learn to see Wesson for who he is and not for who he’s NOT!!! He’s been making little comments since we got him and I don’t like it, I had to tell him to SHUT UP ABOUT IT ALREADY and after awhile he decided to TAKE A CHILL PILL AND CHILL UNTIL I SAY OTHERWISE. He’s doing a lot better today, he’s more relaxed and friendlier with Wesson, He is definitely a handful  (Wesson is too) lol and he’s taken over the reigns of training him to be more obedient ( WAIT A MINUTE WHAT AM I THINKIN’ HE’S NOT THAT OBEDIENT HIMSELF LOL).

Wesson has a great personality, he’s hyper, running around all over the place chasing invisible objects, tail waggin’, run, run, run, now he’s laying ON MY FEET AS I’M TYPING, LITTLE DOES HE KNOW MY FOOT IS FALLIN’ ASLEEP FROM HIS MUSCULAR WEIGHT ON ME but it’s okay I want him to be comfortable with me. I’m looking forward to this next stage of our lives, although we lost Butcher, we have Wessonality to fill the void and to keep mamas company. It will take a while for her to get use to Wesson, she’s missing Butcher and was wincing for him earlier, she’s nervous from all Wesson’s hyperness, I can just imagine what’s going through her mind now that he’s here. I can only guess, but here’s some examples of what Mamas’ is thinking while watching Wesson run around, “MAN YOU DOIN’ THE MOST!!!, SHOOT I’M TIRED YOU CAN DO ALL THAT RUNNIN’ IF YOU WANT TO, I’M CHILLIN’, MAN YOU BETTER GO ON WITH THAT!! DUDE, GO SIT DOWN SOMEWHERE YOU GETTIN’ ON MY NERVES!!! LOL I’m sure those are things Mamas might be thinking watching Wesson, she’s a funny lady dog and we love havin’ she and Wesson apart of our family.

WELCOME HOME WESSON! YOU’RE NO LONGER A STRAY AND LIVING ON YOUR OWN, YOU HAVE A FAMILY NOW AND A HOME WHERE YOU WILL BE LOVED LIKE OUR OWN. Thank you Lord for blessing me with Wesson, Mamas, Butcher, and mostly for MY DAVID the man you sent to find me when you thought I was ready to receive him. Take care my peeps I’ll keep ya’ll posted on Wesson and his progress, BE BLESSED ALL DAY EVERY DAY

animal dog pet cute

Photo by stiv xyz on


This is a sad day for My David and I because we put our puppy to sleep, we took him to his regular Vet for a final follow up before we had him euthanized. We wanted to get a second opinion on Butcher’s diagnosis before euthanizing him (for David’s peace of mind), so we drove him to the Vet where he was examined for about 5 mins before they came told us he has liver failure so after what seem FOREVER, we said our goodbyes, shedding tears of joy and pain before the Dr. came in with syringe in hand injecting the medicine through his IV as he began breathing harder and harder for a few seconds before FINALLY TAKING HIS LAST BREATHE AND PASSING AWAY!!!

I feel so bad for David, he’s truly mourning Butcher and I COMPLETELY UNDERSTAND, I know how close he is to his dogs and at times it angered me how much he showered them with affection but I never felt threatened by it because I understood their bond. He’s had Butcher since for 12 years old they were close so I know he’s gonna grieve Butcher for awhile and I’m prepared to support him in any way he needs me. My heart aches for him, he’s walking around the house grieving for his puppy so I’ll give him the space he needs and the love he deserves to get him, US, through this difficult period. We were gonna have them at our wedding standing next to us while we say our vows but now that won’t happen and although I’m sad he won’t be there physically, We’ll have his picture there TO REPRESENT HEYYY!!!

I’m missing Butcher, I realize now looking back yesterday that he was saying GOODBYE to me when he stood up for a final time laying his chin on the recliner beside my leg so I could GIVE HIM LOVE, he kept his eyes on me the whole time standing there for about 5 minutes before lying at my feet where he laid for the rest of the night as I left for work. I took him for a ride in our new car just last week, he always enjoyed riding in cars, we were attached too and I’m gonna miss him. GOODBYE MY BUTCHIE BABY BOY, thank you for protecting me and my child when David was at work, or counseling sessions, thank you for watching the house when we were gone AND THANK YOU FOR LYING NEXT TO MY BED OR AT THE FOOT OF THE BED ALLOWING ME TO SEE YOUR HANDSOME FACE (BESIDES YOUR DAD) FIRST THING IN THE MORNING.

GOODBYE BUTCHIE BUTCH, I LOVE YOU, I MISS YOU, YOUR DADDY LOVE & MISS YOU AND SO DOES MAMAS! Thank you Lord for the time we had with Butcher, he was a wonderful dog and companion, be with us as we mourn his presence or lack of presence in our lives but NOT in our hearts, in Jesus’ name we pray and we thank You.  Amen

Thank you again my followers for reading my posts daily, I pray my struggles can help you navigate your way through yours with the help of the Lord. Let the words of my mouth and the meditation of my heart be acceptable in thy sight oh Lord my strength and my redeemer. Amen

animal dog pet cute

Photo by stiv xyz on


My David and I have been keeping a watchful eye on Butcher the last 3 or 4 days, we’ve gone through a range of emotions I haven’t felt since my daughter was born 4 months early and almost died so it’s been tough for us but especially for My David. He’s been worrying himself sick, his stomach is tied up in knots, and he has a headache. He’s been crying off and on concerned for Butcher and wandering whether or not he’ll need to put him to sleep. Butcher is still not eating but he’s drinking fluids we give him via syringe and he’s been keeping in down instead of vomiting it back up like he’d been doing previously.

I was sitting in my recliner checking my emails when all of a sudden Butcher gets up from the floor and began walking toward the leather loveseat he enjoy sitting on then all of a sudden out of the blue, he jumps up onto the loveseat and falls asleep. He laid there for an hour before he climbed down slowly back onto the floor. Once he was on the floor I grabbed my anointing oil from the mirror, dabbed my finger in it and laid my hands on Butcher praying for the Lord to heal Butcher from whatever was ailing him. I placed my hand on his stomach/abdomen area, his back, legs, and top of his head praying and speaking healing over him in Jesus’ name. I began thanking God for healing Butcher because I learned that when you pray it’s okay to ask God for something but you must also thank Him in advance for answering it and leave it at that so I did that very thing and left him alone after ending his prayer.

A few minutes passed I was cooking supper when suddenly I see Butcher getting up off the floor and began walking into the kitchen where I was watching him from my breakfast nook. I called David from the other room where he saw Butcher walking towards the water bowl and he got so excited I was happy for him. Butcher walked outside to use the bathroom but changed his mind when he heard  thunder and lightning and walked back into the house. He’s a little groggy from the pain pills but he’s able to walk on his own. He hasn’t been walking since Sunday, he’s been laying around sleeping off and on and not eating, when David would try to feed him he would turn his head away refusing to eat but today he’s taking everything he’s given and has only thrown up twice, he’s now standing in front of me as I’m typing these words waiting for me to GIVE HIM LOVE like he always does when I’m in my recliner, GOD IS GOOD, I HAVE FAITH BUTCHER WILL BE BETTER SOON, PRAYER WORKS, AND GOD IS FAITHFUL!!

Thank God I was hesitant about putting him down, we will take him back to his regular Vet to see if they see what the other Vet saw on Tuesday. It’s weird because I just took Butcher to his regular Vet in late June, we had blood work done and a complete physical too and they gave him a clean bill of health, heart, lungs, and all so it’s strange that he would get to this point in such a short time. The Vet the other day said his heart and lungs are in excellent condition so I’m quite confused as to how we got to this point. Anyways, we’re gonna continue to monitor him and if he begins acting that way again we will take him to his regular Vet to see what’s going on.

He’s looking around at everyone lying at my feet and watching every move David makes, he’s acting like himself again I’m so relieved and happy for both he and My David, maybe now he can stop working MY RESERVE NERVE worrying over our puppy. The bible says ” you desire but do not have, so you kill. You covet but you cannot get what you want, so you quarrel and fight. You have not because you ask not. James 4:2 so I asked the Lord to heal Butcher and make him better and so far he’s acting like the Butcher of old and He heard my cry and answered my prayer,,,,.BUTCHER’S PRAYER!! Let the words of my mouth and the meditation in my heart be acceptable in Thy sight oh Lord my strength and my redeemer and thank you for answering BUTCHER’S PRAYER AMEN